Usually, I’m busy traveling around (mostly) Brooklyn looking for places to drink, eat and spend some time watching football. This weekend I got off my ass, biked way too far, and took a boat.
Here are the thoughts I collected:
– Saturday was all about going to the Cloisters, which is not an STD, it’s a place in Manhattan and after having been there, that’s still about all I know.
– Our first stop was a Jamaican Food Truck where the woman tends to yell at us and she didn’t Jerk Chicken yet, but the Curried Chicken was awesome and my wife and I ate it standing up like good New Yorkers. I’m not sure that any culture on earth eats standing up more than New Yorkers.
– Once we were all charged up from Jamaican Food and Brooklyn Roaster’s Coffee like a couple of good yuppies it was time to hit the bike trail up to the Cloisters
– We’re on the Hudson River Greenway. Do you remember the scene in The Other Guys where they played the White Stripes and Mark Wahlberg slid across the office desk? Well, this is the building they were supposed to be in. Riveting shit, right?
– Speaking of riveting shit, here’s where they used to or maybe still do shoot some soap operas, I think General Hospital maybe (this is a real thought, boom).
– Here’s the George Washington Bridge. This bridge goes from Manhattan to New Jersey. Things about this bridge that are interesting:
1. This is the bridge that got Chris Christie in all that trouble.
2. This is the bridge that Edward Norton and Brian Cox pass in the 25th Hour so that you know they’re going upstate and not out west.
3. This is the bridge that that dude that got beat up by the biker gang should’ve taken instead of going into a neighborhood in order to get hurt.
4. This is the bridge that everyone should take in action movies. Everyone always takes the Brooklyn Bridge because it’s iconic, but hey idiot when you’re running from Zombies or enormous monsters, it’s probably best not to maroon yourself on another island, right idiot? Head west, first Jersey and then the world.
– This is the Cloisters. Yep.
– Ok, so some explanation, the Cloisters is a Museum-ish thing that look like an old fort or something and is filled with religious stuff and weird relics from around the world. Do you know what it really is? It’s a place that gives people around New York a reason to say,”why don’t we go there?”
– (Disclaimer: If you don’t like dumb jokes about religious statues and imagery, scroll past pictures of those things)
– Does this picture need explanation? Nope, it’s just that stupid.
– This is where Kramer got the idea for putting the Japanese tourists in the bureau. Did I mention this was disrespectful? Because it is, very.
– A big thing about the Cloisters is their tapestries and I’m here to tell you that if you’re into tapestries, their tapestry game is tight. The first is a tapestry of a bunch of Peter Lorres reenacting some religious thing and below is what people in Asia think Lions look like (they don’t)
– We stopped in Washington Heights for an arepa before we went home.
– Here’s a little inside info, if you bike 35 miles, your ass will hurt.
– Here’s a treat, on the way home we passed by the exterior for the show Night Court.
– You’re welcome.
– The next day we took the Circle Line Cruise to Bear Mountain for Octoberfest. In the picture below I’m holding a bloody mary before 9am because liquor on Sunday laws.
– This isn’t the most authentic Octoberfest I think. I only saw one couple wearing the German stuff and they were really old, but dammit if they weren’t drunk.
– I like things with sauerkraut, that and being emotionally closed off are my most German characteristics.
– When I was on line for beer I stood behind these yokels, four grown men wearing matching bike uniforms. Some of you may think this is ok, but let me remind you, none of them were Lance Armstrong so there is no reasonable explanation for this behavior.
– I root against Arizona in all things. I’m from Florida. Currently, Florida is the punchline and no one bothers with Arizona, that’s dumb. Look at the scoreboard:
– Water Sports: Advantage Florida
– Old People: Both
– Poverty: Both
– Drug Addiction: Arizona- Meth, Florida- Pills and Weed. Advantage Florida
– Senators Shot in the Head: Arizona 1, Florida 0. Advantage Florida
We can shift the Florida hate to Arizona hate. Come with me people. All we have to do is change blogger’s Google Alerts from Florida to Arizona. Be the change you want to see. Long story short, I hate the Cardinals.
– Rob Lowe is completely upsetting.
– I like when one team wears the throwback Jersey and the other team doesn’t play along. Right now the Steelers look like a bunch of sad Blind Melons and the Colts have no interest.
– I just heard someone say “I’m a big Steven Webber fan!” how much can someone possibly like Wings?
– When the beer is gone it’s time to watch the Series Finale of Boardwwalk. G’night.